Unless you’re a morning person (and if you are, how do you do it?), waking up at the crack of dawn and making your hair and makeup look amazing can be a bit of a struggle. There’s never enough time, you always make a mistake with your liquid eyeliner, and you’ll never be able to rush your makeup and not spill coffee on yourself. Sure, waking up a few minutes earlier means you won’t have to rush in the morning, but that’s like asking Miley Cyrus to stop changing up her hairstyles. It’s just not natural. What is natural, though, is telling yourself lies in the morning just to make it out alive.
Because we know you lie to yourself in the morning too, here are 10 lies we always tell ourselves when getting ready—and what happens soon after.
1. “My legs aren’t that bad. I don’t really need to shave.” (Two minutes later) “Maybe I’ll wear pants today.”
2. “I can definitely hit snooze again. There’s still time to blow dry my hair.” (Three rounds of snooze later) “Ponytail it is!”
3. “Foundation is supposed to be a little dry. That’s fine.” (After you apply the foundation) “That’s definitely expired. I’m stopping at Sephora on the way home.”
4. “No one will notice if I just don’t wear makeup today.” (Once you get to work) “I wish everyone would stop asking if I’m sick today.”
5. “I could just do my makeup on the way to work.” (As you’re making stray mascara marks on your eyelids on the subway) “So, paper bag over the head. Is that a thing yet?”
6. “There’s like zero possibility of seeing my ex today.” (Walking out your door) “Hey, you. Yeah I’m fine, it’s just a busy week. My cat’s sick, so, it’s really taking up a lot of time.”
7. “Daytime smokey eye is absolutely in my skill set.” (When a small child points and laughs at your makeup) “I guess I’ll be picking up makeup remover wipes on the way to work.”
8. “Today, I will nail the fishtail braid.” (Looking at your mess of knotty hair) “Ponytail it is!”
9. “There’s time to stop at Starbucks.” (Seeing the 32 people ahead of you in line) “I should really buy a coffee pot.”
10. “I can just wash my hair tonight instead. No biggie.” (At 11 p.m. when you’re in the middle of a Netflix marathon) “I can just wash my hair in the morning. No biggie.” And repeat.
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